happy guy fawkes' night, for a week ago.

(got drunk on friday)

(saturday morning:)

i went to london and met people from the bus then ate then was happy to find mattresses in the emtpy apartment we were going to stay in and then we met another person from the busand went back to the empty apartment with no furniture except mattresses and ate

tuna & yoghurt

mixed.

then we drank and took a bus 'cross-town' and someone needed to pee so we downed the can so she could pee in it and she went to the back of the bus but she didn't have the requisite balls

and we got to the pub and it was closed and we went to a different pub and i requested vitalic cos i'm fucking cool and then we drank.. and even drank quite a lot of 'found' beers and downed one on the way out and some dorks were doing a survey investigating the 'going out' habits of people so i thought the only appropriate response was to tell several bouncers that we were guest-listed (the bouncer at the legion said i was a 'playa', yay) and then to puke in some street.

it would have been ok but i didn't feel ok after puking, what with all the rohypnol (sic) and yar so i refused to move from the pavement for 2/2.5 hours and some people walked past:-


"one guy with four girls?.. he must be an attention seeker, i'm sure he'll get up if we kick him in the head"

[crack whore] "i'm sure he'll get up if i show him my knickers [suddenly enraged] WELL FUCK IT, NO WONDER HE COLLAPSED WHEN HE IS SURROUNDED BY ALL THOSE GERMANS"



then we took a taxi home and the retardo/show off spoke arabic with the iraqi 'taxi' driver in order to distract him from the fact that i was dying.




much later we woke up and it was akready getting dark and my mother was, predictably, 'not angry, but disappointed' when we came over for 'lunch' 5 hours late.